Collections

by
Marty

Johnny entered the station and did a double take when he noticed the neatly taped gauze on the firefighters' arms. "What happened to you two?"

"It's all Chet's fault!"  Marco gave his colleague an annoyed stare and then ignored him.

Shrugging his shoulders Chet sauntered closer to his locker and then slowly lowered himself onto the bench next to it. 

"This I gotta hear!"  Johnny stopped dressing and sat on the edge of his locker, waiting.
"Well c'mon, Chet.  Did the Phantom attack?"

Marco leaned around Chet and gave Johnny a frustrated look.  "Chet is obsessed!"

"Now you've got me curious!"  Roy, who had been silent up to this point, chimed in.

"I just had to have it!"  Chet exclaimed, cringing as he made a sudden movement.

"Here I thought we were going camping on our four days off," Marco's sarcasm was evident as he slid his arm into his sleeve with care.

Chet rose cautiously from the bench and examined his face in the mirror over the sink.  "Marco, I didn't mean for it to happen!  How many times do I hafta say I'm sorry!"

"The suspense is killing me!"  Johnny gazed from one man to the other, "what happened?"

"Well, yesterday morning…" Chet began.

"What not when, Chet!"  Johnny's voice dripped with impatience

"If you'd quit interrupting, I'd tell ya, Gage, " Chet sniped.  He saw Johnny nod and continued.  "Like I said yesterday morning we were driving back from the mountains when I spotted it!"

Marco leaned against his locker and sighed, "I wish he hadn't."

"It was beautiful…" Chet stopped for a second and relived his discovery, "right in front of us!"  He glanced toward Johnny who was struggling to keep his mouth shut.
"It was a Hodge Spur Rowel, right there on the fence."  

"Is that some kinda bird?  I never heard of it."

"Believe me Johnny, I wish I hadn't either."  Marco shook his head with sadness.

Chet walked up to Johnny, "don't you know anything?  Chester A. Hodge patented it in 1887!  He was a genius!" 

"I'm confused too, Chet.  What are we talking about?"  Roy sounded as puzzled as Johnny looked.

Marco jumped into the conversation, "Barbed wire!  Can you believe it?  He pulled off the road and insisted he had to have some for his collection."

"Marco, I've been trying to get this pattern for ages.  It's rare!" 

"Well then what happened?"  Johnny prompted.

"All I wanted was two feet of it, is that too much to ask?" Chet said without apology.

Marco took up the story, "Chet rifled through his toolbox.  He didn't have any wire cutters so he pulled out a screwdriver, a hammer and a pair of pliers to try to get a length.  We spent half an hour battling with the stuff."

"So that's how you got your…?"  Roy pointed to the bandages.

"Not exactly.  I tried to tell Chet to go find the owner and offer him some money and get permission to take it but he wouldn't listen."

Roy gave his partner a sidelong glance and nodded in understanding.

"There wasn't anyone around Marco; I looked."  Chet said in an exasperated tone.

"You didn't look very hard, amigo." 

Johnny couldn't bite his tongue any longer, "what'd he miss?"

"Evidently the farmer was busy moving his bull to the field where we were," Marco said glibly.  "Just then Chet decided the best way to get his treasure was from inside the fence."

"I figured we could remove the wire better from that angle."

"Well, you were wrong!"  Marco's usually calm demeanor became angry.  "We didn't notice what was going on until the farmer yelled, 'hey!  what are you doing?'  Chet shoved me into the fence and I got this."  He held up his injured arm.

Chet tried to sneak out of the locker room until the door bumped him from behind, making him emit a cry of pain.  "So, this is where everyone is," Captain Stanley scoped the room and saw the rest of his crew.  "Kelly, Lopez, what happened to you?"

"That's what they were explaining to us," Roy answered for them.  "Is it time for roll call?"

"No, we have a few minutes.  Gentleman, let's adjourn to the kitchen."  The captain whisked out of the room and the door swung behind him. 

With reluctance Chet entered the kitchen and stood near the coffeepot.  "Have a seat Kelly," the captain offered, scooting a chair toward him.

"Thanks Cap but I think I'll stand." 

Hank Stanley stretched his legs out in front of him, laced his fingers and put them behind his head, "now what did I miss?"

"Marco and Chet were returning from a camping trip when Chet saw some barbed wire he just had to have."  Johnny filled him in, smirking.

The captain gave him an intense look, "Kelly, you weren't stealing it now were you?"

"No Cap, I didn't steal it."  Chet took a long sip of coffee, nearly scalding his tongue.

"Like I told Johnny and Roy, Chet shoved me into the fence when the farmer startled us.  Then Chet tried to escape from the bull and he landed pretty hard on his …"

"Oh!  So that's why you're sore there," Johnny grinned and started to chuckle. 

Chet gave Johnny a look of irritation, "when I scrambled over the fence I got chewed up too."

"By the bull or the barbed wire?"  Roy leaned forward and gave Chet his full attention.

Chet waited for Marco to continue the story.  When his partner remained silent he proceeded, "the wire.  That bull coulda killed me.  Marco was already headed back to the car when the farmer stopped me.  He was holding out my tools and asked me, 'are these yours?'"

"Chet, ya gotta agree he was a pretty decent guy.  He took us to the hospital and everything!" 

Chet acquiesced, "yeah, you're right Marco.  I just wish…"

"Did ya get the barbed wire?"  A few donut crumbs escaped from Johnny's full mouth as he asked his question.

"I will.  He had no idea his fence was so valuable.  He promised I could have a piece after I help him replace it."  Chet turned his back on them as he rinsed out his coffee cup.

"What's he gonna do with the rest of it?"  Mike piped up, scooping the morning paper into a neat stack and sliding it to the middle of the table.

"Yeah, I didn't hear this part.  What IS he gonna do with the rest of it?"  Marco focused his attention on Chet.

"Uh, he's gonna sell it at the Barbed Wire Convention coming up next month.  That means everybody is gonna own it now!"  Chet stalked out of the room as quickly as he could.  Hank Stanley strolled toward his office a moment later.

"Think he'll pursue another hobby?  Something safer, like stamp collecting?"  Johnny asked the rest of the crew.

"I doubt it Johnny, Chet's stuck on his barbed wire."  Marco told him, shaking his head.  "Don't ask me why but he really enjoys it.  I just hope I'm nowhere near him when he decides to collect more."

"Roll call," they heard the captain announce from the apparatus room.

"You and me both," Johnny concurred, following Marco out of the kitchen.